INTERVIEW WITH EARL THE EASTER BUNNY- Lanai Jarrico Reporting…

 

BACK STORY:  Since the Avatar Anonymous meeting this past St. Patrick’s Day, Larry the Leprechaun has become a victim of relentless virtual glitter bombs, D*** in a box anonymous mailers and shunning by his peers.  Larry has not recovered his pot of gold and Mercedes, his stripper girlfriend still insists it wasn’t her.  According to neighbors, those two are heading for splitsville over Cupid rumors. One avie witnessed Mercedes ripping out Larry’s shamrock garden and hurling swear words in Gailic.

Last month was a doozy at the Avatar Anonymous members, It was my duty as a sponsor to pay Larry the Leprechaun a visit to make sure he was ok after his meltdown.  When I arrived at his place, he was crying hysterically in his garden and his girlfriend Mercedes was nowhere to be found. So I guess the love affair is all but over. After a brief conversation, Larry took off running into the woods so I left…I got better things to do like find out what the Easter Bunny is up to since his arrest. 

While getting media clearance, I could hear *Inmate 20475B, you have visitors* and a high pitched scream.

Lanai: OMG Earl is everything ok?l  I heard you got arrested with some serious charges and thought I’d pay you a visit.  What happened?? You were doing so well at the meetings, aside from the attack on Larry last week?

Earl the Easter Bunny: OMG look who it is….. that nosey SLE reporter. Are you stalking me? What do you want and NO! I’M NOT OK!  Get me out of this place! Larry must have some friends on the inside. You just saved me from an attack by Tammy the Toothfairy, I was about to be his… umm nevermind. *as his hands move behind him, covering his ruffled tail* 

Lanai: Hey! I’m here to help you. Easter is right around the corner and there isn’t enough time to find your replacement.  Listen, I will get you out of here if you cooperate with me. Where did you get the funding for your grass supply?

Earl the Easter Bunny: Snitches get stitches! I ain’t saying a word.

Lanai: Earl, you are looking at a lot of time here...You gotta give me some information that might help your case. Don’t worry whatever you say stays between us…

Earl the Easter Bunny: Are you a lawyer now Missssss Jarrico?

Lanai: No, but I’m the next best thing.  Earl, I’m going to give it to you straight. Did you steal Larry’s pot of gold so you can cop some grass? If you don’t come clean, I’m going to leave you here to deal with Tammy the Tooth Fairy.

Earl the Easter Bunny: OK! I confess. Mercedes and I are having an affair. I was helping her pack up Larry’s belongings and stumbled upon his gold in the closet so I stuffed my pockets but I didn’t take all of it! I used some of it to buy the grass and the rest I distributed in child support for all my kids. 

Lanai: Don’t you feel better telling the truth? I have to say that is pretty low of you to take Larry’s woman and his gold too. You need to get your eggs together.  Your actions will cause a holiday disaster. If I don’t get you out of here, Easter will be ruined.  

Earl the Easter Bunny: Just because I stole some gold and sold grass doesn’t make me less qualified to be the Easter Bunny. I’m sure you did some scandalous sh*t before. Don’t judge me.  While there are rumors going around about Uncle Sam and a few others,  allegedly Uncle Sam bought off people with cartons of e-cigarettes to be part of his militia to end Second Life of the bad seedy people. And The Arbor Day Treant tried to pass their seeds as pot seeds. Let me tell you, there are some scandalous mascots out there. I’m not the first and won’t be the last so please just get me out of here so I can go hide some easter eggs or something.

Lanai: Ohhhh sounds like I need to pay a visit to some other mascots… Thank you for the information Earl, you are such a snitch!

Lanai paid Earl’s bail and he was released from jail so he can now hide eggs for the little avie kids and Easter will go on without a hitch thanks to The SL Enquirer.

 Happy Easter!

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Interview with The Easter Bunny -Lanai Jarrico Reporting…

Spring is finally here as the weather starts to warm up and colorful flowers are blooming.  It is the season for renewal and celebrating Easter and spring break!  In Second Life residents are preparing for the change in seasons by picking up the snow and rezzing, fresh grass, flowers and greenery.  To celebrate spring, many shops are having sales, venues are doing hunts and more people are hanging out and hooking up.  Spring seems to have that effect.

During Easter break, SLE set out in search for the Easter Bunny to find out what his plans are.  He’s not an easy mascot to catch up with but a few tricks up the CEO’s sleeve helped lure him in for an interview. She just didn’t plan on such a dramatic display.

Lanai: Hey You! I have been trying to track you down for days now. Sorry about the intrusion but I figure this place would attract you. Got some time to talk?

The Easter Bunny: If it isn’t Ms. Jarrico…. WTF! *tries to cover up his carrot* I thought this was a private spa!

Lanai:  Language! Before you get upset, let me explain… I have been all over the grid asking for you and no one seems to know where you’ve been.  A Leprechaun named Larry, who was on his way to the Bahamas for Spring break, told me you were into facials, massages and happy endings, whatever that means…. so I figured if I visit some spas I might find you and sure enough you were here!

The Easter Bunny: So this was a trap? Was that all he said to you? *suspicious tone*

Lanai: Pretty much.  However, he did tell me you weren’t a very good tipper after private sessions. *looks at him suspicious*

The Easter Bunny: Oh never mind him… He’s loaded with his pot of gold so he shouldn’t complain about that.

Lanai: If you say so. Now you have me curious. What exactly is a happy ending? That leprechaun seemed a bit jilted when he mentioned it.

The Easter Bunny:  Well… Um. Wait a minute… Is this some kind of interrogation? I’ll just say happy endings are legal on most adult sims in SL so I’m in no violation nor obligated to share that information with you!

Lanai: Geez! Calm down, you act like I just caught you in some kind of controversy!

The Easter Bunny: All I wanted was to relax… Now if you don’t mind…scram.

Lanai: Hey now relax and pull the carrot out you’re a$$.  I just wanted to ask what your plans were for Easter break and surprise you with your friend.

Larry the Leprechaun: Hey handsome. Remember me?

The Easter Bunny: You have got to be kidding me!!! What’s HE doing here? Ya know, if this wasn’t a “free” spa I’d want my money back!

Larry the Leprechaun: Don’t act surprised to see me after all we have been through.

The Easter Bunny: Lanai! You set me up! I am writing a letter to Santa and you are going to be sorry for this!

Lanai:  Wait what? Larry, told me you would be delighted to see him…

The Easter Bunny:  Like hell I am! Get him out of here. I have reason to believe he gave me a “Chicago Sunroof” and ruined all the Easter baskets I had worked so hard on. I couldn’t make any deliveries for Easter. Larry ruined it for everyone!

Lanai: a what?

Larry the Leprechaun: *innocent grin*

The Easter Bunny: look it up on urbandictionary.com

Lanai: *looks it up* OH FFS! That’s disgusting!

Larry the Leprechaun: I’m sorry, I was mad. You are lucky you didn’t get an “Alabama Hayride” I’m tired of you keeping us a secret. I thought I was your lucky charm but you know what!?! You can kiss my blarney stone and the next time you want a happy ending you better ask someone else. I’m done with you! You don’t even make a good Easter Bunny, you look like the Trix Cereal Mascot on crack. You silly rabbit!

Lanai: *looks that up*  wow….

Larry the Leprechaun: That’s right I said it!

The Easter Bunny:.*burst out in tears feeling all defeated*

Lanai: Why do I suddenly feel like I’m in a bad lifetime movie?

Larry the leprechaun: Ms Jarrico. He and I have been dating for some time now and never once has he showed this much emotion. So thank you, I’ll take him home now.

Lanai: For a happy ending?

Larry the Leprechaun: That and an “Easter Cream Egg”

Lanai: *looks that up*  OMG you are sick! This interview is over!

Happy Spring SLE Fans!

References

Chicago Sunroof

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Chicago+sunroof

Alabama Hayride

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Alabama+Hayride

Easter Cream Egg

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Easter+Cream+Egg

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Interview with The Easter Bunny 2015

It is always interesting interviewing holiday mascots in Second Life. Some are reluctant to be interviewed by The SL Enquirer while others take their chances and hope for the best. As ridiculous as these interviews can get I usually have fun with them. This year I caught up with the Easter Bunny but it took a weird turn. Some mascots seriously need to be screened for strange addictions and drug abuse.

Lanai: Hi. I was told I could find the Easter Bunny here. Can you tell me where he is?

Easter Bunny:  Hey there sexy! You are looking at him.

Lanai: Ohhhh. You aren’t the kind of bunny I was expecting to find. What happened to last year’s Easter mascot? I don’t remember him having a British accent and dressed like a Playgirl playmate.

Easter Bunny: Pickings were slim this year for the position so here I am.  As unfortunate as it sounds that bloody fur ball got fired and thrown in the clinker for selling synthetic Easter grass to avatars. He was busted by an undercover Linden.

Lanai: Oh My! That’s terrible news. And you are the replacement?

Easter Bunny: Yes I am and tell me about it.  Of all the wonderful things he could have been doing like orchestrating grand Easter egg hunts and filling baskets with tasty treats, he decided to make the holiday mascot community look bad with his utterly atrocious and repulsive behavior!

Lanai: I can see how this has personally affected you but don’t you think you should be looking a bit more traditional and kid friendly?  What made you apply for the position?

Easter Bunny: That is a brilliant question Ms. Jarrico. Maybe my uniform is a bit edgy and erotic but I can get the job done. I was given this position through a temp agency. It has been hard for me to find a real job since rehab. I was originally looking for something with more dignity and self respect.  But I had no other choice. It was either this, a stripper, escort or Furry park ranger. Those jobs would have been counterproductive in my recovery.

Lanai: What is this virtual world coming to? Rehab??? I don’t mean to be all judgy but don’t they screen holiday mascot applicants and have a dress code?

Easter Bunny: Apparently not.  I can see my looks being a distraction. You keep staring at my carrot.  Rest assured I’m a changed man. My days hooked on sex are over.

Lanai: Oh sorry but that carrot of yours is hard to miss.  I have to say, this interview is getting more awkward by the minute. So you were in rehab for sex addiction?

Easter Bunny: Admitting that I had a problem was the first step. Yes, I was at it like a raging hormonal rabbit. It got to the point where I was facing kidney failure from severe dehydration.

Lanai: Uhhh.

Easter Bunny:  What?

Lanai: nothing. So, what do you have planned for Easter Festivities this year?

Easter Bunny: Well, rather than hosting Easter egg hunts, I was thinking it would be fun to play hide the carrot.

Lanai: How does that relate to this holiday though?

Easter Bunny: Well… You know everyone likes a good hunt right? I have a nice big carrot here…

Lanai: OK stop! This is getting a bit uncomfortable. Don’t you think hiding your carrot sounds like a sexual reference? I’m not sure it is a good idea.

Easter Bunny: How do you know that? Let’s do a test run and see how you like it.

Lanai: I don’t think so. It seems to me you are relapsing.

Easter Bunny: I’ve been sex free for nearly an hour. That is a new record for me.

Lanai: Unbelievable.  Do you have a sponsor helping you?

Easter Bunny: Yes, it is funny that you asked. Cupid is my sponsor.

Lanai: Cupid? Really!?! Wow of all the sponsors they could have set you up with, Cupid was the most ideal choice?

Easter Bunny: Yes , due to his erectile dysfunction, they figured he would be able to keep me from relapsing and giving in to my sexual urges.

Lanai: Where is he now?

Easter Bunny: at the bar.

Lanai: Is this some kind of sick joke? You holiday mascots are all screwed up. Why do I suddenly feel like this is a Dr. Phil combined with Jerry Springer episode? I was hoping to interview you about Easter but this has turned into some kind of weird confession and intervention.

Easter Bunny: I know this interview has you feeling a bit confused and uncomfortable. Let me relieve your stress. How about we go back to my place and talk over dinner and wine.

Lanai: You have got to be kidding me! I’m out of here.

 HAPPY EASTER SLE FANS

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HAPPY EASTER, IT’S 420! Interview with a Virtual Easter Bunny

Easter lands on April 20^th 2014 this year and in Second Life residents have adorned their landscapes with pastel colors, flowers and Easter Decorations. 

The SL Enquirer  kicked off their festivities by hosting an Easter Egg Decorating Contest.  While trying to gather contestants, Lanai had a chance to meet with this year’s infamous cotton-tailed mascot. Word on the street is Lanai has been up to no good with Pedro Cottontail and doing some very un-holiday things. We here at SLE think she has taken things a bit too far and needs an intervention…but none of the staff want to step forward and bring up rehab or counseling.

We understand that Lanai has been having a hard go with holiday mascots and is suffering from some hook up regrets and work exhaustion. At least she does not remember the tryst with Cupid, thanks to wishes to erase that memory were granted by Larry the Leprechaun in March.

Incident with Pedro Cottontail

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Happy Easter: Interview with Pinky the Easter Bunny - Lanai Jarrico Reporting…

According to Google© search, Easter Sunday falls on March 31st this year.  It is best known as the most important and oldest festival of the Christian Church. It depicts the resurrection of Christ for religious observers. This holiday starts with Lent ; a fasting period, ending with The Holy Week. For Catholics, the Thursday before Easter is called Holy Thursday and Good Friday is also observed. Easter is also linked to the Jewish Passover. For many, the Easter Holiday traditions vary in different ways.

 For non religious observers, it is most likely the only day a year they go to church on Sunday. The Easter Bunny seems to be the main attraction and decorating eggs is the thing to do. Many buy baskets full of jelly beans, assorted candy, chocolate bunnies and fake grass filler. Local communities celebrate with Easter parades and a precession of local fire truck tossing candy at scattering kids along the road and the mayor rolls by waving like Miss America in a suit and tie.  Family gatherings seem to follow where parents display their little girls in pastel overly frilly dresses and dolling up little boys in shiny shoes, dress shirts, extra starched slacks, including creases and button up vests.  

   

   Sometimes overly excessive parents slap a fancy hat on their kids and parading them to Church and to visit the grandparents were they collect money,  sloppy kisses and take photographs to add to their albums, for later blackmail and embarrassing photo sharing with visitors and  high school dates.

 Oh the Joys of Easter! However you decided to observe the day, remember the real reason for the occasion.

With all that said, in Second Life, Easter is observed with themed dance parties, decorations and Easter hunts. Some even dress like bunnies and hop around the grid creating the holiday atmosphere. Others litter the landscape with Easter Eggs, pastel trees and vibrant green pastures full of colorful spring flowers.

While wandering the grid taking in the festive locations, I came across this year’s Easter Bunny Mascot. Apparently just like the last Cupid, the previous Bunny must have thrown down his costume and went on to a whole new SL profession; perhaps stripping down to a banana hammock at one of the adult clubs.

  Interview with Mr.Pinky the New Age Easter Bunny

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Interview with the Easter Bunny Lanai Jarrico Reporting...



Lanai Jarrico at EasterTown

      


     Easter is a holiday that is observed on the first Sunday after the full moon by Christians around the world. It consists of a feast and celebration of the resurrection of Christ. For others, it's a trip to the mall with the kids for pictures with the Easter bunny followed by a quick stop at a convenient store for cheap baskets with excessive fake grass and jelly beans. To each his own.

In Second Life©, Easter and other religious holidays are observed in a variety of ways. Avatars can go to Sunday services at a church, worship in a synagogue, temple or other sacred places with their virtual family and friends. For Easter, activities include, special services, Easter egg hunts, holiday themed parties and concerts to raise funds for Charities and other humanitarian causes. Besides that, lots of things go on sale, and in the role play community, it's fun to just use your imagination.

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Have you ever wondered what the Easter Bunny does the rest of the year? Happy Easter from SLE

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