One of the hardest things in life is suffering a loss. Even if it is part of the cycle of life. It doesn’t matter what religion you are in, race, gender, success, looks, or even age. Death is inevitable. At some point in our lives, we will all face the end of our journey. Everyone grieves differently. Some take it very hard and others learn to accept reality. Either way, there is no easy way to say goodbye to someone you love. You can only keep their memory alive by remembering the good times, using their inspiration to make yourself a better person, and honoring them in different ways. In a sense, every single person you meet and interact with in life plays a role in your growth just like you played a role in the life of the person lost. Many times we are faced with consoling a grieving person and this is where it gets tough. What are the right words to say to ease their pain? Do we stay silent and just listen or do we offer advice that may have worked on ourselves when we faced a time of crisis?
Death is a topic that many people like to avoid because it is associated with hurt and fear - two of the emotions that trigger us the most. When balanced with love it is possible to grow stronger and be at peace in a world where death and loss will always be part of our lives. The best advice to give anyone struggling is to let them know you are there for them. Even the smallest gesture of listening is an act of support.
A hug also goes a long way. An embrace makes a person feel safe and comforted even just for a moment.
One of the greatest obstacles we face in a virtual world when dealing with a loss of a friend or a partner is the feeling of helplessness due to many factors. The distance is a major one. To many in the real world, they cannot understand the deep connection people form in a virtual world community. We meet from the inside out. This is a phrase I coined many years ago when I realized just how connected to a person we have never met face-to-face can be. In our everyday lives, we speak to people at work, at functions, and even in our own homes but we do not truly share detailed thoughts like we do when we are typing with our friends or partners in Second Life.
There is something very different about it and the only ones who truly can understand and support each other through our online losses are members of the virtual world community.
In the past 17 years in Second Life, I’ve lost friends and acquaintances and offered my condolences to many who have felt this type of pain. I've visited memorials in Second Life and lit many candles, sat on benches in moments of silence while remembering those I've met, and even gone to virtual funerals where I fought back tears listening to others grieving and sharing their personal stories about the person lost. These are the ways we can come together in Second Life to support and help each other through the healing process.
The SL Enquirer would like to offer anyone who wants to highlight someone they lost by sharing their thoughts, a poem, a snapshot, or some words of condolences.
Submit your Obituary Message here and we will add them to an SL Obituary Page on SLE.
*hugs*
Lanai Jarrico
CEO, The SL Enquirer