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Thursday, February 1, 2024

Sledding- Stacey Cardalines Reporting...

 



Winter can be a drag in the real world, with freezing cold temperatures, driving on ice and all that. It is important to remember that it is also a season of fun, especially when you factor in sledding. January and February need not be a season of misery. You just have to know where to go to find fun winter things to do. Enter Stacey...


Sledding is a lot like her cousin, skiing, but sledding is easier to do. Skiing involves buying a bunch of gear and driving up to Vermont to go to the mountains. Sledding can be done in your hometown (if your hometown has snow) with a sled you got for $9.99 at Target. You don't have to buy a ridiculous spandex bodysuit to go sledding, although I did so. 

I have an image to uphold, and I also wanted to dress brightly so the St. Bernard dogs could find me in whatever snowbank I sledded into. I then went off in search of somewhere to go sledding.

I went to a place called Brave Island, which has the Wonderful Winter Wonderland theme going, at least for the season. I had the place to myself, although I keep odd hours and the place might be jammed during different parts of the day. Either way, I went to the top of the mountain and got ready for some downhill work. It took me a while to find the sledding part, but you are most likely less stupid than I and would probably fare better in a search.

Brave Island provides the sled for you, a simple one for a single sledder and a team bobsled (?) type for couples or very good friends. Once you sit on it, you start heading downhill. You get a good ride, not too fast. The ride could be a little longer, but you can extend it somewhat by sledding through the non-sledding parts of the sim. It's very impolite, but I was there by myself, and someone had to do it.




I would estimate that I got going 35 mph or so, which is like 70 kph for all you Europeans reading this. I never quite figured out how to stop, other than crashing into something that halted my forward progress. I used a head-first sledding methodology, as I'd rather crack my head than break both legs and maybe the ol' Five Hole as well.

Sledding into a wall is usually the worst-case scenario, but the other sledding sim that I tried out- one with a mammoth luge-style elevated track- actually saw me fail to negotiate a curve and sled off the sim into whatever passes for outer space in SL. I actually had a picture of me doing so, but I was very small in it and would have been unrecognizable without the caption.

I did think of a sport that I would like to try... Sled Bowling with humans! Line ten people up in Candlepin formation at the bottom of a hill, go to the top of the hill, come down heavy on the sled and see how many people you can deck. It's got speed, exotic settings, violence, humor and appeals to a wealthy demographic... what's not to like?

I'll have to get Lanai to pay me enough to hire ten models to act as bowling pins, but I think I can make a go of it. Some clever animator will have to make an animation that mimics pins falling. Who knows? Maybe I can give up journalism and feed myself by running a Human Sled Bowling operation. It might be illegal in the US. Someone told me to maybe try Indonesia.

There was no NBA or NFL 150 years ago, and now you can't turn on the TV without seeing someone dunking or throwing a touchdown pass. Who's to say Human Sled Bowling won't catch on in a similar manner? 

The fun thing about SL is that Human Sled Bowling probably exists somewhere, perhaps in BDSM form. I just haven't been crafty enough to find it... yet. 





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