The softer side of kink” -Pen Dragon reporting ~ The SL Enquirer

Second Life has a lot to offer. The choices you can make are almost limitless and fueled only by your imagination. It’s not hard to agree that there is something for everyone. Most people enjoy shopping, going to clubs and living a pretty normal, happy life but there are those whose tastes and preferences run more on the wild, kinky side.

At some point almost everyone has come across a sex sim, maybe even a BDSM sim and wondered what all the hype and interest was about for these places. Some may even take a deeper look out of curiosity and may or may not have found something they were interested in exploring while others are turned away because it offends their sensibilities or find it too taboo. Some think of BDSM and imagine whips, leather, cuffs and chains and see it as a form of emotional and physical abuse.

The term BDSM is like an umbrella; it covers many varied and different things. The acronym itself means Bondage & Discipline, Dominance & submission, Sadism & Masochism. Within each of those categories there are an almost unlimited number of specific kinks, decisions and lifestyle choices with just as many people who make those choices and live the way that suits them best. Many who do not know about that lifestyle may be under the impression that there is only one to participate in BDSM, only one way things are done.

Allow me to introduce you to something different about BDSM, an aspect of that lifestyle that is quite often misunderstood and maligned. It is called the Daddy Dom (Dominant) and babygirl relationship. At some point you may have seen someone with a Daddy tag or a babygirl tag and wondered what that was about or what it involved. Some have the idea that it is incestous or a form of illegal age play, but as you’ll discover, but it can be something completely different.

The roles in the relationship, Daddy and babygirl, are similar to that of a Dom and a sub (submissive) insofar as the Daddy is the head of the relationship and the babygirl consensually agrees to obey his rules and decisions and agrees that she belongs to him. While this is typical, there are open and even polyamorous Daddy & babygirl relationships. To me one of the most beautiful things about a lifestyle relationship is that it is defined by you to meet the needs and desires you have instead of following traditional societal standards of how a relationship works.

What differentiates a Daddy babygirl relationship is the dynamic on which it is based. Typically a babygirl behaves in a more innocent, childlike manner allowing her Daddy to care for her and allowing her to be free from the stresses and drama of the world around her. That is what leads to the biggest misconception about the relationship, age play. The babygirl is not pretending to be a young child, she is simply behaving as a child might, there is no age given. A babygirl can be any age, it’s the state of mind that drives her. She may want to color in a coloring book, be given a bath or read a story. Sometime it is just a temporary need to retreat to a more carefree mental attitude. The Daddy is responsible for meeting her needs when she is in this headspace. He will take total control and make sure that her needs and desires are met. The Daddy is also responsible for her discipline, as well as rewarding her for good behavior. This is another BDSM aspect of the relationship.

Another popular misconception is that the relationship is incestious. Because of the title Daddy, many think of this role as that of the father and the babygirl being the daughter. Typically, that is not the case, however; as states earlier, there are those who choose to roleplay that particular relationship, but it is not the norm. The Daddy is a father-like figure, but not the father. He is still her husband, boyfriend or Dom. The Daddy is her caregiver, her lover and her disciplinarian and in many cases gets to know his babygirl on a deeper, more intimate level than what most relationships allow.

As with any relationship there is, of course, a sexual component and within the umbrella of BDSM this can and often does involve bondage, sadism, masochism and the aforementioned whips, chains, and cuffs. Again, every relationship is different, tailored to the couple involved and no two are the same. But it is the use of such devices and toys that will deepen and strengthen a relationship. The deep trust a babygirl, or submissive, must place into her Daddy or Dom in order for her to consensually submit herself to him and allow him to use these devices and toys, trusting that he knows what he is doing, is what brings about the unsurpassed intimacy of a BDSM relationship.

Just as important as the sexual encounter can be, so is the time taken afterwards to make sure that the babygirl or sub is okay both mentally and physically. This is called aftercare and is a vital part of the experience. This is time taken to mend any wounds, comfort and calm. This reinforces the bond between the two and deepens the relationship further.

Any BDSM relationship can be complicated, involved and satisfying but, and this is my own opinion, the relationship between a Daddy Dom and his babygirl is a special one. It’s a deeply trusting, inconceivably intimate and extremely loving one. Most people find love, at least once in their lives, but few will ever know the tight bond that develops between a Daddy and his babygirl.

If you are interested in learning more about this lifestyle, I strongly suggest you visit the Babygirl Skygarden or Omega D/s library.